I hate 'smelly' food. If it smells that bad you shouldn't be eating it... and why is it always women who eat this disgusting shite? Lets say you discover something at the back of the fridge; it's only been there for 4 months, you smell it - Christ it stinks. The logical course of action is to now throw it in the bin. All normal people would agree with me but on the rationale of people who actually like 'smelly' food (or abnormal people as I like to refer to them); the only course of action to take is to chop it up, cover it in gravy and eat it in front of something fucked up and depressing like X Factor. Horrifying.It seems some people literally relish the challenge (of their own invention no less) of creating foul concoctions of food to upset everyone at the table. This weekend I witnessed somebody decide to take things one step further by creating the world's first 'Perverted Salad'. Needless to say; it stunk the room out and caused everybody present to vomit into their pockets.
Pervert's Salad
(WARNING: Do not try this at home)
Ingredients (in equal quantity)
Lettuce
Strawberries
Onions
Raisins
Gherkins
Olives
Cucumber
Peanuts
Tomatoes
Lemon juice.
Method
Chop it all up and sling it in a bowl. Enjoy to the disgust of everyone around you then 'have a word with yourself'.
